kick start!

Mom got me a gym membership at Astre today for my birthday! Very excited. Its perfect! They have two pools, a whirl pool, weight room, free weights, classes, ellipticals, steppers, bikes, and so much more! We went today and did an hour. Its great to have help from my mom. She's very motivating and I know she'll go every day with me! And of course I'll go myself. I need to get in shape! I think I've let it go long enough and I don't want health problems. (And I'm still contemplating the Marines... or maybe the Navy.) I don't know yet. I just want out of OHIO. =)

My 22nd birthday weekend was AWESOME! Too much drinking though. (Gotta work double time at the gym!) We had a bonfire the family dinner Wednesday (before Dad left) at the Ice House... 40 cent wings! Friday, bonfire at the house with Ash, Jay, Pat, Andre, Mel, and Mom. Saturday, Twilight afternoon with Mel! and then to Relic's show at the Cellar with Wendy, Mike, Mel, Pat, Mom, Amanda, and her sister Rachel. Then Sunday we had the cookout at the house. Mel and Mike brought Sebastian! And they got me a cake =) My 22nd years have been up and down, sad and happy, brutal at times... but there are so many memories. We reminisced at the bonfire it was really entertaining! Hopefully there will be tons more, with old and new friends and family!

I also had my doctor appointment this morning. My surgery is the 18th of May. Crossing out fingers that its benign, not a tumor and just a sebaceous cyst! There's a small chance it could be bad... and when you push on it it feels like it runs down into my back which could be a tumor and not a cyst. I'll take it as it comes, though. No worries!!

Watching Intervention and gotta take a shower! Work in the AM!
Love all!

Gone baby gone

I'm moving into the apartment!! Finally my own place, again! It's going to be soooooo nice! It's a little further from work but not too bad. I can't wait! Mom will stop over still, which sucks, but I'll get over it.

We went to The Ice House for 40cent wings. I'm so stuffed. And the beer didn't help. blah. I'm so tired too. I'm always tired, maybe there's something wrong with me. I feel like an old lady!! And I hurt like one too. My back, heels, my effing eyes. Everything! I've never felt this shitty. Mom better get here soon so we can leave.

I'm going to take a nap.
Happy earth day!

Pathetic. But I can't seem to let it go

I wish things didn't bother me so much. I always let them get to me and I shouldn't. Even when I know these things are going to happen or change... I let it bug me like I had no idea. It's hard to deal with. This stuff is hard to deal with. Life sucks. And it's not that its unfair... I just think I put too much faith in people that don't care. Or I always think people are good at heart and will make unselfish decisions ??? I don't know. I don't know how people can be so mean, forgetting, selfish, greedy, uncaring... All if that. I don't get it. And I hate not knowing.

You can't trust anyone but yourself. And maybe that will never change

Going to bed to sleep it off
Hopefully.

bad habit :: happy 4.20 :P

I finished the fourth Twilight book, Breaking Dawn! It was good. (I still think S.Meyer isn't a passionate writer and lost the love story part after the first book) But it was good and of course I was happy it ended happily! I have to get started on getting things together for the Book Club! (; I need a list of some books and ideas of how to go about this. Lindy and some others are getting lists together too! Its gonna be fun.

Interventions on tonight! Half hour to the best tv show ever starts! I'm excited its the first Monday in a while that I will be able to watch my show with out being late or being interrupted or any of that!

Mom's moving back in this week and Pat and I get to move to the apartment! SO EXCITED! I can't wait! Its hard going 19 years living with your parents, then one year moving into an apartment and then the next moving into a house!!... and then HAVING TO MOVE BACK IN WITH YOUR PARENTS! Its been good, don't get me wrong. Saved money, had fun with my dad, ate better... but I'll live on my own any day. (In fact, don't tell Pat, but if half the year I could leave and go live completely by myself, on an island in the middle of no where... I totally would. People piss me off.)

=)
Oh, wouldn't it be cool to say you were a groupie for 8 Solid Inches!!!! HAHAHAH.
Guess you had to be there!!

Love you all!

((Remember my birthday's this Friday =)!!))

beautiful ohio

My doctor's office called this morning. They made the appointment for my surgery. Its on the 27th and its being done by my mom's cousin. I'm so thankful that I got insurance! =) The cyst is hurting really bad. I can't stand it any longer. Thankfully my doctor made the appointment so soon. I called Annette to tell her that I needed that day off and she called me later and asked if I wanted the next day off too. I didn't think about the stitches and the location of the cyst... my collar on my work shirts rubs right on it. And that's why she's the boss ;) always looking out and thinks of everything!

I have a lot to do and just now, 2:56pm got one of those things done. I finished my bills. (And put some clothes away) I meant to be tackling everything as soon as I got up this morning, but I was sleepy and then Pat asked if I wanted to play the Simpsons on xbox 360. And then race. We always rent games but never get to play them together so I felt obligated to him. PLUS, I want to read my book and he'll throw a hissy fit. I'm going to start cleaning my car right after I finish this and then I might have to get eggs for the cake. I forgot we ran out the other day!

Well its a beautiful day outside. I hear the birds chirping, the wind blowing, the hot rods next door revving... =) Summer's almost here!

Loves.

total eclipse of the heart.

I'm nearly done with Eclipse! i decided to take a break from reading though, I was starting to get a headache! I definitely like this book better than the second, New Moon. The first is still my favorite. Ash gave me the fourth one so I'll start that probably tonight.

I made my appointment for the doctor's today! 2pm. Finally. I can't wait to get this checked. Its a cyst or something similar, on my back near my neck. It hurts really bad and its just unbearable now. I can't even sleep well because of the location of it! The pillow irritates it and its very tender. Its getting bigger every day too. ((Keep in mind I didn't have insurance for a whole year that's why I couldn't get it checked! I just got my insurance through Sheetz a couple of weeks ago)) Dad gets cysts but his don't hurt. Pat and Mom said I have little ones all over my back... that's a scary thought. At least you can't see them. They don't have heads and they're so small they look like bumps. None of those ones hurt, as far as I can tell. My back is sensitive and always hurts, but I assume its not the cysts doing that. Who knows. I hope y co-pay isn't a lot... Ashley's was only $30. I probably won't be so lucky. I was told that Sheetz's insurance is sucky.

I'm baking a cake today! Caramel with caramel icing. Its been in the cupboard forever so I decided it needed to be used. I also have to clean. CLEAN. !!! Yea, we'll see when that happens! I' just to absorbed in the book and I'm tired... I'll get to it. Eventually.

I have a project I have to start =} Its badddd. But its hilarious and he deserves it! Maybe I'll upload it when I'm through. Heehee. I feel so devious!

Loves.

heaviness falls upon you.

I bought the third installment to Twilight today at Barnes and Noble. =) The paperback doesn't come out until August so I spent more than I wanted to. It better be worth it.

The second book, New Moon, I read in about 3 days. (I worked A LOT this past week) I read it that fast because I wanted to see if Bella and Edward were going to be together. I really wanted them to be together! I don't really like the character Jacob. And I didn't know most of the book was about him. Something I didn't see coming. I started the third one today. Not that far in to it but enough to be irritated that Bella hasn't 'changed' yet. I don't know why she just doesn't get married to Edward and get it over with! And Jacob's back. That character is such an ass. If he was my best friend, he'd get his butt kicked! He doesn't seem to care about Bella's happiness, only to keep her in safety. I'm going to borrow the fourth book from Ash. And I asked for the movie for my birthday!

(the 24th of this month!!)

I talked to Colleen and we're going to start a book club! Its going to be so much fun! We'll meet places and talk about the books, and have movie nights if there's movies based on the books we read! We have to come up with a name. Something good. I don't want anything normal like The Book Club. Any ideas?

Pat rented some games so I'll see ya later!

reading the words that are written.

I finally gave in and surrendered. I decided to buy the book Twilight. I refused to become a part of that fad. But I gave in when I saw the book at KMart. It was like ten bucks or something so I decided, "What the heck". It wasn't bad. I like the story and the characters. And I already knew that Robert Pattinson was playing Edward in the movies, so I had a good picture of what I would want Edward to Look like. (Our little secret: I think Robert Pattinson is absolutely perfect.) The story is easy enough to understand. And there's love, action, regret, sadness, all of it. I thoroughly enjoyed it. On the other hand, I don't like the way Stephanie Meyer writes. She's not as passionate as the authors I normally read from and that was a disappointment. Maybe she wrote it for all different ages to read and understand, but I think it could have been better.

I watched the movie too. Edward♥
I'm also done with the second book, New Moon. I'll talk more about that later.
Gotta go! =) Peace.

loving life. <3

I might have had that vision. The one that tells you everything is going to be okay. That everything is turning for the better. I think this year might actually be a good one! Last year was bad. The year before that, almost worse. But I think this summer might actually be, well, awesome! Things have changed. My life seems brighter! I haven't felt this way in a long time. Like nothing is truly wrong. Everything if falling into place. A stress has been lifted from my shoulders. Maybe I'll finally be able to calm down and live life slowly. I still know things are going to go wrong, things will still change. But I think for once in a long, long time, there might actually be more good than bad! Its usually the other way around. A few good sprinkled on a LOT of bad. I'll take it as it comes, and I thank whatever divine being granted me this!

P.S. I started reading a new book. Its AWESOME. Title: Acheron Author: Sherrilyn Kenyon -- Definitely up there with The Quest and those types of adventure books. A must read!

I want to move to Australia

I think it would be fun to live in Australia. It would be different and exciting. I want to do something adventurous. Maybe I'll plan a trip and save money to do it this summer. Sounds like a plan.