Chaos

There are not enough words in the dictionary to describe what I am going through inside. These past weeks have been hell and now I come to realize that its been going on for years. There's so much I didn't know and I thought we were good at communicating. So much has been damaged and I don't know if it will ever be right. I have no reassurance and its frustrating. I don't know if it will be okay. I feel like I'm losing my soulmate. My best friend. My only true friend. I can't live my life without him. I'm not prepared to nor do I want to. But nothing seems right. Now we have trust issues and more problems then I think we had before! I don't get it. Love isn't suppose to hurt.

I just want someone to fight for me to stay too.