July 17, 2008

complications.

Families are complicated. And mine is pretty damn crazy. Its hard to think I haven't learned anything from them. I'd be lying if I said that. I have learned enough to know where I got my strong traits and where my weak ones came from too. I just don't know if I'm ready to admit that I see our connection. I see where I might be just like my parents when I reach there age. Its a scary thought. You think, "No, I'm my own person". But I've realized I really am like my mother and father. And I can't guarantee that I won't think the way they do or follow in their foot steps. And I know it may scare my boyfriend or even my friends, but I don't know how to prove to anyone that I'm not going to be that way. I don't even know. I can't even convince myself!

In the end whatever happens, happens. I keep telling myself "its your choice, you decide what you do". I'm not going to put the blame on anyone but myself. Because I still have the power to choose my actions. And I can't regret the things I choose or do, I just have to learn from them.

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