Day 67/88 !!! [Getting close!]

Ahhhh!! We're so close! I can't believe how fast July and now August, have gone compared to June! June was horribly long and dragged out! It sucked so bad. But now I only have 18 days till I'm driving down to SC to see my babe! I can't wait for Family Day. That will be Thursday and it will be the first official day I see Pat. I think it's like 3 or 4 hours with him and he'll show us all around PI and we'll have lunch. I'm not sure if we should bring lunch in a cooler or just stick it out in the lines. I don't know yet. I'm so excited! Our cabin get-away is going to be perfect too! Then on the Monday we get home, we'll get the marriage license and schedule an appointment with a judge!! I can't wait to be married to my other half!! He makes me so happy!


I've gotten a few letters in the last two weeks, more than I though I would. They're supposed to be really busy. Maybe next week I won't get so many ? Idk... but Pat had his wisdom teeth, all 4, removed and they cracked one of the other teeth while they were doing it. He said it hurts really bad but he goes back on admin week to get it fixed. What else has he said? .... He made me something!! I wouldn't say what and he said his materials were limited but I'm going to die when I see it! He said some of the other guys tried to call him gay and make fun of him for making it but he said "You know me, I squashed that shit right away" He said he loves me so much and he doesn't care what people think :) I have the best guy ever. He said a lot of the guys keep asking about our wedding and want to be invited.


I love getting letters from him! They're so nice and I love reading them over and over. =) I have lots to do today (it's my day off) So I better start now, or I'll end up doing nothing all day!


xoxo
♥ I love Patrick!

Day 35 [No mail two days in a row]

It really sucks that there's no mail today (because of the 4th) Maybe tomorrow I'll have 2 letters! Hopefully, I think I would cry if I had to wait till Wednesday for letters! I doubt the guys did anything special for the 4th, maybe extra pt, who knows! But it was a Sunday so maybe they took it easy on them. 

I watched some of Jarhead last night when I went to bed. I want to watch it with Pat when he gets home. I think I'm going to watch it tonight when I get off work. 
I wonder if the UPS and FedEx guys are off today... it would be really cool if I got some of my stuff in the mail today! I think I ordered from 3 different store. Sears, Best Buy, annnddd.... Victoria's Secret. Not having a car sucks and sometimes I find it easier to buy clothes online, even though I can't see them in person. But sometimes I get so frustrated and pissed when I'm in a store and can't find anyyyttthinnng! 
I was thinking about finding a different dress for the graduation then the one I got from Gap. I don't know, I'm not in love with the way it looks on me. 


Wet Seal has these really cute military styled dresses. The blue one also comes in an off-white and has like tie/bow in the back. It also looks like a thicker material. The green one I think is stretch and plain in the back. I think they are really cute. The green one comes in red too (not a bright red). I think I might buy the green one. I wonder how short they are though. Sometimes Wet Seal's dresses and skirts are sooo short. And I don't want to be worried the whole day that my ass is hanging out!
Its so hot in the house. These next three days are supposed to be in the 90s and feels like it today =\ Mom and Dad should put the air on. For sure. I'm gonna go and try to do some stuff


♥ Peace

Day 2 of 88 [God places the heaviest burden on those who can carry its weight]

Its raining. And its exactly how I feel. I don't want to do anything, I just want to lay down. All day. I'm doing better today then yesterday- not as emotional! I miss him so much. Mrs. C sent me a text last night(I was at work) when she got the last phone call. He was yelling off of a script and she didn't have time to say anything. She said it sounded horrible and made her sick. She's afraid of the hell he will being going through. As much as I wanted the last phone call... maybe it was better she got it. I don't know if I could have handled it. I wrote him a letter last night too. I'll send it as soon as he writes me. I hope and pray he does great down there and I hope he's careful not to get hurt. I want him to be done on time. I can't stand being away from him. I have to work today. I don't really feel like it, but I know it will keep me sane.

I got the room cleaned up a lot this morning. Its a lot nicer now that its not cluttered. I still have things to go through, though. I alphabetized my dvd collection also. Then stood in front of all of them(which is A LOT) for ten minutes and was like "wow, I don't want to watch any of these". :( I also weighed myself. I had lost a few pounds the last couple of days. Haven't really been eating or drinking much. My weight is: 221. I've gained 40 pounds since the beginning of the year :\ My goal: to lose as much as I can! I'm just going to go for it and do what I can. I need to start going to the Y, but since I normally work till midnight, I don't get up until 11 or noon... and its hard to go to the Y before I have to be back at work. I'll make it work though.

I love you Pat.
♥ Jessi

The beginning of a long situation.

I don't know how I'm going to do this without Pat. Its only been an hour and 41 minutes and I already don't know what to do with myself. I have to keep reminding myself that I can't call him and I can't talk to him... and that I won't get to see him in a few days or when I get off work... this is really happening. And it sucks. And I'm nervous that he's going to get hurt or get sent home. And if he gets discharged, for ANY reason, he's going to be a basket-case and probably suicidal. And that's really really scary for me. It ended up being a sad day. I think Pat teared up more than he wanted to. I think he was really touched by how many people actually care about him. He always thinks no one does and that no one's going to miss him when he's gone. But he's wrong. I'm glad he got to see and talk to the people he wanted to, before he left. I think it meant a lot to him.

Dad came home today! That was a nice surprise, although it will probably cause problems. Mom and Dad, will both be pissy now. And I had to half explain why I'm driving Pat's truck and not my car. And I thought I'd have the house to myself next week. Mom and Ash are going to Florida - Sunday-to-Sunday. Well, Dad's going to be home for a while. So there goes peace and quiet. Haha... not really, Dad doesn't bother me, I just can't do whatever I want now.

I have to work tonight, 8 to midnight, not too bad. I just wonder how many times I will break out in tears. I hope not a lot. Hopefully we'll be really busy and it'll go by fast and I won't think about Pat being gone. :(

[its just 13 weeks...] Please God give me strength, not to go nuts without my babe :)

I love you Pat and I know you will do your best and make us all proud!
♥

P.S. As long as he does well at Parris Island, he should graduate August 27th!

where did summer go?

Its already the Canfield Fair... where did summer go?? I feel like I didn't do much at all and it went SO fast. Every season feels that way anymore. Ever since I realized I wasn't a kid anymore. Ever since then, things have gone down hill. I want to be optimistic. Right now looking back at what I've done and looking into my future, doesn't provide anything to be optimistic about. That light of hope is diminishing and with everything else. Eventually things will turn around, but who knows when that will be. If I had three wishes, one would be to make everything okay tomorrow. The other two wouldn't matter. I just want everything to be OKAY. Be BETTER. Be GOOD again.

Ehh, enough of that. I'm not in the mood to think about my problems.

On a positive note, I quit smoking about a month ago and feel GREAT! I also lost 10 pounds! Which for anyone who forgot, I'm losing weight to join the Marines! I did talk to the Navy also... they have all the medical jobs/fields. And I would rather do something medical. But I'm not sure the Navy is what I really want. I really want to push myself and put myself through something that will show me what I am capable of and make me happy. The Marines can do that. And Sgt. Petronio was assigned me(even though he's at the Salem office and I'm from Canfield) but he's awesome! I love him and I barely know him! He makes me motivated and is very encouraging! I don't think he even knows it lol.

I'm debating on whether to go to the Hookah Bar with Bobbi and Wendy. I have to work tomorrow and I'm really tired. But I really want to go out with them. Maybe I'll go out for like a half hour.

I better go get ready then. Peace out.

American Pie 2; Review

Got my free DVD from Columbia House in the mail the other day! I ordered American Pie 2 because it brings back memories! I love it, no matter how raunchy it is! It always makes me laugh and puts me in a good mood. Yes it is a sexually humorous movie about a group of friends just out of their freshman year of college, but its dead on! It portrays exactly how young people are! About having a good time with friends, their crazy relationships, sexual encounters (and you can't tell me, no one is trying to have sex!), and one crazy summer that they will remember forever! I love the cast: Jason Biggs, Tara Reid, Seann William Scott, Chris Klein, Shannon Elizabeth, Alyson Hannigan, Mena Suvari, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Eugene Levy, Eddie Kaye Thomas, and all the others! The soundtrack to this movie is probably one of the best soundtracks ever. Not only is it great music and songs, it fits this movie perfectly. The music is exactly right. The movie also teaches lessons in funny ways. Take for example, Jason Biggs's character Jim. He has all these embarrassing things happen to him and he stays strong and doesn't let them discourage him. All in all, this movie is always good for a laugh!

I have to cut it short tonight... I'm getting tired and I have lots to do tomorrow. Its my only day off! :) And don't forget to follow me on twitter to get to know me more! twitter.com/jubie2o
LUVVS!

Where the beats at?

I am so tired of there not being good music out. Where did all the artists and beats go? What is going on? 8 out of 10 songs, suck anymore! And even worse, artists who had good songs, can't seem to keep bringing good ones. Its very frustrating for me. That's why I refuse to buy CDs. ITS NOT WORTH MY MONEY AT ALL!! If you can't make good music, then I'm not spending my hard earned money on you. If, after I download something, and it sounds good, I might buy the album. (But normally I don't because I'M THE WORKING POOR!) And its summer which makes it more frustrating, I want good music during the summer and I'm only finding good, old songs from previous years. And even those, are getting boring to listen to. Music is very important to me and I take this seriously! [I needed to vent about that, sorry]

♥ jes

beautiful ohio

My doctor's office called this morning. They made the appointment for my surgery. Its on the 27th and its being done by my mom's cousin. I'm so thankful that I got insurance! =) The cyst is hurting really bad. I can't stand it any longer. Thankfully my doctor made the appointment so soon. I called Annette to tell her that I needed that day off and she called me later and asked if I wanted the next day off too. I didn't think about the stitches and the location of the cyst... my collar on my work shirts rubs right on it. And that's why she's the boss ;) always looking out and thinks of everything!

I have a lot to do and just now, 2:56pm got one of those things done. I finished my bills. (And put some clothes away) I meant to be tackling everything as soon as I got up this morning, but I was sleepy and then Pat asked if I wanted to play the Simpsons on xbox 360. And then race. We always rent games but never get to play them together so I felt obligated to him. PLUS, I want to read my book and he'll throw a hissy fit. I'm going to start cleaning my car right after I finish this and then I might have to get eggs for the cake. I forgot we ran out the other day!

Well its a beautiful day outside. I hear the birds chirping, the wind blowing, the hot rods next door revving... =) Summer's almost here!

Loves.

"I like it when he pinch me, so I know I'm not dreamin"

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It feels like a perfect October day out today. Its a little chilly for September but feels so nice. I'm more excited for fall then I thought I would be. I dunno why but now I don't care how cold it gets I just want summer to be GONE. Summer was so complicated and a bunch of bullshit. I know the rest of the year is going to be just like this but for some reason I feel a little better now that summer's over. This year has really been bad. Hopefully, soon, all the shit will die down and I could start living my own life, but I doubt it. My life's taking a drastic change and its out of my hands and I'm getting fucked left and right. Its getting pretty bad and there's not much I can do but wait and ride it out. Eventually things will be back to normal, or as normal as they're going to get. I don't know, I just wished all I had to worry about was cooties and boo-boo's again.

Amanda's dying my hair tonight. Its just cheaper if she does it and I want to pay my bills. I don't need to waste $80 when Amanda can do it for $15. I was her model today at school. She got a 100% on the straight cut. Tonight she's going to shape it for me though (I look bad with a straight cut).